Summer Road Trip :: Portland 2014

We took our first summer road trip to Portland a few weeks ago and had a fantastic time.  Our friends let us use their condo as a home base and we took daily excursions to eateries, book stores, libraries, skate parks, thrift stores, donut shops, ice cream parlors and walked the oh-so clean city streets.

This video was Grady's project during our trip.  He captured images with his iPad and used an app called Over to insert words & graphics.

It's about 3-1/2 minutes long.



I think it's sweet what he wanted to remember and look forward to our next family vacation in Bodega Bay in just a few short weeks.

Skateboarding :: A Father & Son Love Story

My husband and son are spending their evenings together at a local skate park.  I have been waiting for this to happen since the day my son was born.  

Let me explain.

Steve's first skateboard park membership + Grady's first night riding

I've had the privilege of spending hundreds of weekends and afternoons after school with Grady.  Sports never figured into our mother-son equation because sports were never my thing.  Sure, we would spend hours perusing library shelves or go to the beach to collect smooth rocks and sea glass at low tide, but that was all guided by me and my interests.

Introducing my son to the ins and outs of sports would not be my area of expertise.  Not in the least.

Over the years, I've longed for my husband and son to hang out in the yard and play catch or throw a pigskin around (did I just refer to a football as pigskin?) My husband has a passion for the Los Angeles Dodgers and an appreciation of statistics.  I just assumed that when we had our little boy that one day they would be that father and son in the backyard throwing that little white orb back and forth.  I'd seen it with my father and my brother.  I assumed it would just happen.

It never did.

Or I should say, it rarely did.

You see, my kid isn't a baseball player.  He tried.  It wasn't his thing.  I thought my husband would push him harder and maybe even force the issue.

He never did.

He's not that kind of parent.

And so years have gone by and the only team sport our son seems to really enjoy is soccer.  His other interests are reading books and holing up in his art studio to listen to audiobooks and fold origami, build make believe worlds with his Lego collection or draw make believe monsters.  He's an only child and he likes being alone.

All that changed on the first day of summer vacation.

Grady unearthed a skateboard that he purchased from the Goodwill last year and asked for us to take him somewhere where he could ride it.  You see, we live in the country and have no sidewalks or smooth asphalt on our property or street.

My husband quickly obliged and so began their nightly jaunts to find a place to ride.

The father-son duo decided his Goodwill board was not the best to learn on and so they took a trip to Play It Again Sports and scored a used board with better trucks (Trust me, I had no knowledge of this lingo until this new hobby took hold).

Grady sanded and painted a design on his new-to-him board and off they went find a skate park and break it in.  And, as they say, the rest is history.

A few months ago my husband and I were talking about waiting and watching to see what Grady would be interested in next and then following his lead.   Instead of us leading him to books, art and sports - we would sit back and pay attention to what interested our son and not interfere too much.  Rather, we would wholeheartedly support it.

It didn't take long for us to see his new passion unfolding and that was kind of exciting to us.

His board is near him at all times.  He spends hours just sitting on it reading or trying a new stationary trick.

We're watching Tony Hawk videos and packing his board and gear in the back of our cars every time we go into town, you know, just in case we pass a good place to skate.

Steve and Grady have formed a new bond over this little piece of wood and four wheels.  They are sharing knowledge, creating memories (falling down quite a bit, too) and making time for one another.

Just like I thought it would be.

Only different.

Only better.

Life Lessons with Watercolors + Salt

I've been in a little bit of a creative rut lately.  It's like that for me.  I'm an all or nothing kind of gal and when I'm into something, I'm really into it.  And when that phase passes, I'm totally over it.

Rise Up ~ Aqua + Mustard watercolors + salt

Drawing and painting have been taking a backseat to reading lately.  I've been gobbling up books and enjoying the worlds that they have been transporting me to.  Last week I read this, this, this, this and this.

Worlds Colliding ~ Red + Orange watercolors + Salt

Sitting down to paint today, I experimented with circles, watercolors and salt.  The marbling effect was so fun to see come to life.  I feel like an elementary school student today with this artwork, but I'm okay with that.  I'm embracing my inner child.

Molten Orange Sun ~ Chartreuse + Orange watercolors + salt

If I think too much, then I can't create and I've been in my head a lot these days.  I stopped drinking alcohol for 15 days.  I haven't gone that long since I was 27 years old.  It kind of sounds bad when I lay it out like this, but it's true.  The past 17 years have been filled with celebratory champagne toasts, wine shop ownership and my newfound interest in crafting cocktails at home.

And while I don't want to talk about this issue too much here in this space, I needed to acknowledge it so that I can move on with my life and have the occasional adult beverage without guilt.  I've been marinating myself in words and solitude.  Throwing myself into my role as wife and mother.  Baking, organizing file cabinets and purging closet shelves.  These are my Virgo coping skills and they are well honed from years and years of small disappointments, mistakes, hurt feelings and longing.

When I take the route of organizing the chaos in my life, I am desperately seeking balance.  Most of the time I feel like I'm on a teeter-totter and there is a steady up-and-down, give-and-take with work, family, home and friendships.  However, lately it has felt like someone has unexpectedly jumped off the other end of the teeter-totter and there I go crashing down hard on the dirt floor.  When this happens, I actually like to sit in this place for a little while and think about what has gotten me here.  It's not a pity party per se, but more of a taking stock of things and sifting through my emotions.

I broke my 15 day alcohol-free run the other night and I felt a little bad about it.  Shamed myself most of the day yesterday and now I'm ready to move on.

Sunrise #1 - Blue + Orange watercolors + salt

This last painting is my favorite.

Tumultuous blue waters.

A hopeful sunrise on the horizon.

Salt.  If you are wounded, it can sting - or it can add texture and beauty.  It's all about perspective.

Possibility and new adventures await me.

It's a new day.

Day 2 to be exact.

It looks to be sunshiny & bright.

Last Week of 5th Grade

1st day of 5th Grade (left) - Last day of 5th Grade (right)

The days leading up to the last week of school were chock full of parties and half-days for the boy, meetings, work & an illustration workshop in the city for me.  In my attempt to keep us on track and not overly booked, we worked hard as a family to try and keep a balance and not get too overloaded.  Let me tell you, it was not easy!

We attended the West Marin Review release party for Volume V of their journal at Toby's Feed Barn in Point Reyes to help celebrate Grady's watercolor Invisible World being featured in the magazine.  His work graced page 24 and he was mentioned in the editor's summary of this newest edition at the beginning of the journal.

I learned that this beautiful journal is put together by an all volunteer staff and it took over one year to bring it all together.  Grady's painting was one of the few selected out of 325 art submissions.  This award-winning literary and art journal is a lovely collection of poetry, prose, photography and art.  They also publicly acknowledged the young artists in attendance and thanked them for their efforts and inspiration.

We could not have been more proud of our son.

1.  A year's worth of bread ties
2.  Teacher presents
3.  My last lunch note of the year!

As we ticked off school days on the calendar, there was a certain lightness in our home.  We had been working on teacher gifts (Grady's "Home" poem) and handmade cards for the last few weeks and it all came together rather easily.  I say easily, but it was because we were prepared and had been slowly working on this project for weeks.  I've learned from the past and cramming in making and gifting in the last few days of school is nuts, so we avoided the madness and planned ahead.  It made all the difference in the world.

The big event of the week was G's first school dance.  He claimed to have little interest in attending (or dancing for that matter) and so I didn't focus on the dance too much.  He did, however, want to give a little present to his girlfriend.  Now this was all fairly new to me.  I mean, I knew this pretty little fourth grader kind of liked him and he liked her throughout the school year and sat next to her in chess club, but I had no idea they were, like, boyfriend-girlfriend.

I realized that this was my first opportunity to help guide him in how to treat a young lady.   Off we trotted to the garage and dug into my bin of presents (leftover items from when I owned a retail store, books I pick up on sale, pencils, journals, etc.).  I mentioned that girls almost always like to receive jewelry or flowers.  He quickly selected a sweet bird pendant and decided to hand-stamp a gift bag for her.  A red heart for love and a black mustache for humor.  Yes, he's most definitely 11.

Not only would Grady be finishing up his 5th grade year, but this would be his final year at his elementary school.  As much as we had prepared for this as a family, I wasn't prepared for the emotional boy that got off the bus on the last day of school.

I met him at the bottom of our lane and chatted with the other kids who were getting off at this stop.  As we slowly made our way up to our house, I noticed Grady had his headphones and sunglasses on and his cheeks were wet.  I immediately thought about the dance and the girl and the present, but he assured me that wasn't why he was crying.

As hot tears ran down his face, he told me he was going to miss his friends.  I pulled him to me and gave him a hug and assured him that we would make every effort to keep and foster those friendships.  His hot, sweaty body clung to me and sobbed.  I put my arm around him and guided him home, washed his face and settled him into bed with a few books.  His tired body gave way to sleep and I pondered this new phase we were about to enter.

Top of the List Summer Plans :: Skate Park + Libraries

That evening was an emotional one, but after a long, hot shower and a father-son fish taco making session, Grady let go of the sadness and settled back into himself.  He mourned the loss of his familiar school and circle of friends and I told him it was okay to be sad, to feel things deeply - that meant that he cared about people and that was a good thing.

Our first blueberry harvest from our one and only bush + oatmeal-blueberry-lemon glaze cookies

And just like that, he moved through it.  The next day was the first day of summer vacation and we had fun planned.  Sleeping in was top on the list, a library visit to stock up on books, a lunch date at our favorite taco joint, a trip to the art supply store and a myriad of errands in town rounded out the day.

We did a lot of hunkering down as a family over the weekend and cooking at home.  Sunday found all three of us in our Queen-sized bed reading and working on our computers.  Breakfast was slow and we had the entire day before us with nothing pressing on the calendar.  We formed a plan and went to town to catch a movie, grab lunch and buy the boy some new soccer cleats.  All very ho-hum, but really nice to have a Sunday with my husband in tow.

Airborne at Doran Beach

And so we close this chapter of our six years at the local elementary school.  I can't believe it went so fast.  People are always telling you how fast it goes, but you never believe them.  It really served us well and I feel grateful for the strong foundation is has given Grady academically and socially.

He's ready to move on and so are we.

But first, we have an awesome summer to plan.

Poem :: Autopilot

autopilot

i rub your back
open the shades on your bedroom window
morning, little man

i start the coffee
and crack open eggs 
for your breakfast

you shuffle to the bathroom
book in hand
hair - big and puffy

i pack your (predictable) lunch
pretzels, PB&J and apple slices
adding a note for your later amusement

your father rises
ruffles your helmet hair
banters back and forth

All of a sudden it’s time to go
and you two leave the house
and trek the seven country miles to school

fueled by coffee
it’s time to pay bills
and sign permission slips

work on our social calendar
tidy up paperwork
and send out handwritten notes

i shower
dress 
and head to the office

work, grocery shopping
thrifting, library
home

i hear the brakes on your school bus like clockwork at 3:34 pm
you saunter up our dirt and gravel road
hi, mom.  can i have a snack?

some days i make it for you
but lately you make it yourself and plop down to read 
tuning out the world and diving into your own

chores get done
homework comes out of your backpack
dinner gets started

your day 
is the centerpiece of 
our mealtime conversation

what did you learn today?
what are you reading?
what do you want to do this summer?

showers are preferred over baths lately
lightning fast teeth-brushing sessions
kisses and hugs goodnight

can i read? is the nightly question
sure, but lights out at 9 pm
thanks, mom

i tidy up the kitchen
put order to my desk
kiss my husband goodnight

5th grade has been such a good year
independence
coupled with new and improved self-confidence

this is us right now
in a rhythm 
and it feels like we are all on

autopilot 

Now.

"Mom, I want to paint this."

Inspired by Nici's recent post Now about her children, I wanted to use that framework for a post about what all of us are doing right now.  I love this idea, as days and weeks go by so quickly and I want to remember the little, everyday things that bring me joy as I witness our family in this rhythm of life we are currently in.

Grady
Ripped jeans with smiley faces written on the knees in black Sharpie
Devouring author Rick Riordan's Mark of Athena
at the table, in the bathroom, in his bed, in the car
New freckles are splashed across the bridge of his nose
Fresh scratch on his right knee
End-of-the-year thank you note-writing to all of his teachers
Flipping his head to the left to get his sandy blonde locks of hair to swing across his forehead just so
Lots of looking in the mirror
Wedgie wars with his father that I'll never understand
Purple. All. The. Time.
Negotiations for more iPad time
Black, slouchy knit cap to contain his mop of hair
Plucking blueberries off our our one and only bush & eating them like candy
Sucking honeysuckle and bringing in flowers for me to enjoy, too
Watering our sunflower baby seedlings
Making his own peanut butter and jelly sandwiches

Steve
Fixing, syncing, troubleshooting all of our tech devices
Playing blackjack with G
Showing our son the Honey Badger videos on Youtube (nice, eh?)

Me
Morning doodling in my art journal
Too much coffee, always
Experimenting with embroidery
Searching for a new typewriter on Craig's List
Reorganizing every file in our file cabinets
144 pages into a 737 page book
Baking these blueberry oatmeal cookies with lemon glaze

Home
Local farmers are making hay
Grasses surrounding our home are over five feet tall
Volunteer opium poppies are blooming in the back garden
Newly planted nasturtiums bring hope for more edible flowers
I just discovered out oven has been 100 degrees off for the past seven years

Later today we will join in the celebration for the release party for the 5th volume of the literary magazine The West Marin Review.  One of Grady's watercolors will be featured and we are quite the proud parents.

Happy Sunday, folks.

Happy first day of June, too.