Process.

Page from my journal [stamped letters + hand-carved stamp]

I woke up early this morning, eager to get out of bed and start work on a new project that will combine my love of letters and art.  This little project has been percolating all week long with this lady.

I feel like I'm floating this morning, barely awake and forcing myself to make coffee and get caffeinated for the hours of creating that lay ahead of me.  I quickly grab my trusty container of sharpies, hand-carved stamps and ink pads.  I turn on my typewriter and surround myself with rich card stock, original watercolors I've painted earlier in the week and beautiful, loose pages from a magazine I've been saving (just so that I could type on them!).

I futz around with the settings on the old IBM resting on my kitchen table and familiarize myself with the storage and margin settings.  I almost can't start because I have so many questions and concepts funneling through my brain.

UPPERCASE? or lowercase?

Capitalize? or all lower case?

Hard left margin? 

or centered?

Bold?  Underlined?  Italicized?

[Brackets]? or (parenthesis)?

Typesetting (and letterpress printing for that matter) are an art form all on their own.  After checking out and perusing dozens of poetry books this week, I realize that the words and the art most definitely go hand-in-hand and I have an important job of getting it right.

Kitchen table turned temporary art studio

I finish a few mock-ups and ask my guys for their opinion.  I shouldn't have done that.  Now?  I'm second-guessing myself.  Back to the drawing board, paint some new pieces, send a few samples to the poet for her feedback.  

And now I wait.

It's funny because I know what I like, but I'm not sure I'm ready to hear the opinions of others.  Good, bad or indifferent - I'm not sure how that is going to land over here with me.  On one hand, it's exciting to collaborate.  On the other, I kind of like the safety of just making things that I like.  

Digital + Analog

One thing I've figured out for sure is that process is just as important as the end result for me.  I have to like the making I'm doing.  For example, my husband thought the typewriter font was too small for the poem I was typing and suggested I just use my computer and play with the fonts.

Hold. Up. Mister.

Whoa.

Um, no.  No. No. No.

Letters + Concept

You see, I wanted to hand-type all of the poems.  I wanted to carve the stamps or paint the artwork myself.  That part makes me really satisfied, really content.  Somehow that feels more authentic to me than cranking out mock-ups of different fonts from my laptop.  It's not only the fonts, but I would have trouble pushing my art through the printer and getting the line spacing and margins just right.  That part would drive me absolutely and totally insane.  If I'm being honest, I have to tell you that I have a love-hate relationship with my printer.  This dysfunctional relationship has been going on for years.

Even though my husband politely pointed out that I was, in fact, "storing" the words in the typewriter memory and wasn't that the same thing?  I kind of hate when he makes a good point.

Well, I just don't see it that way and feel it's different than using a computer.  We agreed to disagree and I kind of stomped off.  Yes, I stomp for effect sometimes.

I'm settled now.  

I've painted some new watercolors and now I'm about to carve a few new designs on my brand new slab of Speedball Speedy Cut.  Carving stamps is meditative and soothing.  I really like the process of creating stamps and then embellishing paper with them.

It's 2:31 p.m.

This has taken me most of the day.  I've loved the process of making and creating.  Even my castoffs are beautiful and unique.  I love the marriage between the printed word and the bursts of colorful designs planted right on top of them.

Works in progress

My need for approval is quietly hovering above my work, but my work satisfies me and fills me up.  It's a new feeling.

It feels good.

It feels like just enough to keep me going.