weekending :: mother's day

Artwork circa 1976

Mother's Day always feels a little loaded to me.  I know I have a lot of quiet expectations for the day and sometimes I wrestle with those feelings.

My husband's mom died when he was six years old.  He didn't get the chance to go to her funeral.  Shortly thereafter, he had a very stoic, unaffectionate step-mother that raised him for all of those in between years until he went to college (and then his parents divorced).  I always kind of expect him to show Grady how to celebrate me on Mother's Day and you know what?  He doesn't really have those tools in his tool box.

Don't get me wrong, he does the best he knows how to do - but not having a mom who dotes on you or showers you with love and affection can really tweak the way you love people.

Grady growing like a weed among our weeds

With the help and inspiration of Mamalode, I decided to throw a little Mother's Day Eve party with a handful of my friends who are also mothers.  If you're reading this and you know me, well, you know I love the eve of just about anything - birthdays, xmas, Thanksgiving, Arbor Day.   It was completely low key.  Everyone brought appetizers and a bottle of wine.  Husbands dropped their wives off and picked them up when it was all said and done.

We sipped on a lot of sparkling wine, told funny stories, talked about schools, cursed a fair amount and laughed really hard.  I don't get to see these moms very often, but it felt so good to come together and share our journey of motherhood.  I'm absolutely going to do this again next year.

My husband and son usually cook and clean up on mother's day.  This year was no exception.  I woke up early and grabbed my pillow, blanket and book and sat outside watching the sunrise until both of my guys woke up.

My silly models posed for me while I figured out my Polaroid Land Camera settings
Steve's hair is epic in these photos

Steve taught Grady how to make me coffee and fixed breakfast while I doodled and painted at the kitchen table in my art journal.

Grady retreated to his art studio for most of the day, surfacing only to make himself a PB&J and to grab more books and supplies from his bedroom.

My husband decided to give me the best present.  Wait for it . . . we purged several of our kitchen cabinets and loaded up my car with donations for the thrift store.  I know, I know - romantic, right?  He also cleaned up his office and tidied up the garage.  Usually, he's working for most of the day on Mother's Day, but today he was available and present and that was the best gift.  All of us together working on the house and/or our projects.

Blurry Polaroid Landcamera photo using black/white film
Mother's Day 2014

I also realized that asking for what I want on Mother's Day is okay.  Often times I just suppress it and hope my guys read my mind.  This year, I asked for the house to myself the evening before Mother's Day to celebrate with my friends.  I asked Grady to make me a card.  I asked for us to do a project together (and we did).  So, even though my husband's emotional Mother's Day toolbox was rusty, he totally came through and showed my son how to quietly celebrate me.

And nothing makes a Virgo mom happier than a reorganized kitchen and a homemade card.

Nothing.